Life | I Hate People? How to Deal with Negativity
I'm just going to come right out and admit it. This evening I have been in one heck of a foul mood thanks to trying - and failing - to juggle my 1001 jobs whilst packing, planning, inevitably losing my railcard, re-packing, waiting, re-caffeinating and finally drifting off to sleep more stressed and wired than ever.
We all know how it is. We're having a bad day and suddenly we enter into one of those - as I described it over a lengthy, uncalled for and ranty skype call to my boyfriend - an "I hate people" black cloud. Which is really a very eloquent cry for help:"I'm having a bad day, please lock me up with a nice cup of tea and a bubble bath so I don't do any more damage to myself or those around me".
For me the final straw is usually - and this is rather a sad point - people who walk too slowly. I just can't. I appreciate that some people walk slower than others with kids and shopping bags dragging them down but no, here I'm talking about the regular Joe the Mr. "I'm just going to walk slow today, like real slow, and negate to check behind me for at least twenty minutes" that you inevitably get stuck behind at the worst possible time. Also people who force you to choke on their cigarettes at the traffic lights or who don't reply to my e-mails at 16:59 when their office shurts at 17:00 - what can I say, I'm a very reasonable person at heart [insert sarcasm here].
1) Are you being reasonable? Like really though?
Although it may seem like the ultimate insult that you are not getting the up-most attention from that random passerby that happens to be crawling along at a snails pace and it may seem entirely reasonable to wish that the ground would open up and swallow them whole, leaving you to skip along your merry and well-paced way. But if that actually happened you wouldn't be feeling so smug with yourself. Cut them some slack.
2) Would you have done the same thing? (Probably)
I'm not going to lie, I don't think there's a person on this planet who appreciates a lengthy e-mail at 16:59 - unless of course it's a belated Hogwarts acceptance letter that goes to great lengths explaining why exactly this was not delivered by owl. But it's only human to prioritise the imminent train home over some random bloggers e-mails; even if they are going to spend the next sixteen hours or so on tenterhooks, it only adds to the excitement of it all (right?).
3) Is it really their fault? (Well no, but...)
Most of the time, people don't even realise they are doing the things they do until someone points it out to them. And no, you should not be that person. That can wbe incredibly damaging to the self-esteem and self-confidence - especially if we're talking about some average Joe in the street or the new kid at the office. Chances are they haven't been sent from Satan to spite you in your time of great suffering, but it doesn't hurt to keep a look out...
4) Could you maybe be at fault here just a teensy bit?
Rule #1 is to never admit defeat, but maybe we could slide to a small chink in the armour? Could you, Little Miss Perfect, be at fault for a change? Is the reason that you're annoyed at Mr Slow Walker over there perhaps because you decided to run and grab that new handbag that you saw in your lunchbreak, from the store that you evidently do not have enough time to visit? No? Of course not.